「中國夢」笑話

這些英語笑話都不新鮮,但有些卻給冠以「中國夢笑話英文版」,算是中式幽默嗎。

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: “I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, “I’ve been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I’ve never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. I’ve never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I’ve never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, you’re welcome to stay here, too."

一個人給一家他計劃在假期裡停留的小旅館寫了封信﹕「我非常希望帶著我的狗,它很乾淨很有教養,你能允許它和我睡一間屋子嗎?」

旅館主人立即回了封信﹕「我經營旅館很多年了,狗從沒偷過毛巾、床單、餐具或牆上的畫。我也從沒有在半夜因為狗喝醉胡鬧而趕走牠,狗也從不不付帳就跑掉。實際上我們非常歡迎您的狗來我們旅館,如果牠為您擔保,也歡迎您來。」

x    x    x    x

Father: I promised to buy you a car if you passed your examination, and you have failed. What were you doing last term?

父親:我曾向你許諾,如果你考試及格就給你買倆小汽車,可你卻未能做到。你上學期一直在幹什麼呀?

Son: I was learning to drive a car.

兒子:我在學開汽車。

x    x    x    x

Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.

Jim和Mary都是精神病院裡的病人。一天,他們沿著醫院的游泳池散步,Jim突然跳入泳池的深水區,他沉到了底部。Mary立刻跳下去救他,她潛到水底,把Jim拉了上來。

When the medical director became aware of Mary’s heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office.

當院長聽聞了Mary的英勇行為後,他立刻翻看了她的病歷檔案,把她叫進了自己的辦公室。

“Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you’re being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you’ve regained your senses. The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom,he’s dead."

「Mary,我有一個好消息和一個壞消息要告訴你。好消息是你能跳入水中救其他病人,這說明你的意識已經恢復了,你可以出院了。壞消息就是,Jim,你救的那個病人,他還是用自己的浴袍帶子在浴室上吊自殺了。」

Mary replied, “He didn’t hang himself, I hung him up to dry."

Mary說:「他沒有自殺,是我把他吊起來好讓他晾乾。」

廣告

2 thoughts on “「中國夢」笑話

發表迴響

在下方填入你的資料或按右方圖示以社群網站登入:

WordPress.com Logo

您的留言將使用 WordPress.com 帳號。 登出 / 變更 )

Twitter picture

您的留言將使用 Twitter 帳號。 登出 / 變更 )

Facebook照片

您的留言將使用 Facebook 帳號。 登出 / 變更 )

Google+ photo

您的留言將使用 Google+ 帳號。 登出 / 變更 )

連結到 %s